Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Don't Quit the Day Job

Guy goes to the paint store, buys some white paint. Driving back to his mother's house in the north end of the city he is driving through a green light when bam. He gets slammed by a car being chased by the police. The other car rolls. A fire hydrant is hit. Water sprays everywhere. The guys in the rolled car get out and run down the street, the cops in foot pursuit. The other guy gets out of the car feels pain in his legs and lays down on the sidewalk.

When we get there, I see the guy on the sidewalk. His face and shirt are white with goop. I look inside the car. There is an exploded paint can. We board and collar him and take him to the hospital.

I check in with him later and he is all cleaned up. "Dude," I say, "I thought you were a white guy. I was thinking what are you doing in this part of town?"

***

Later we go to a nursing home for a lady who lost control of her motorized wheel chair and slammed her foot into her bed. The first thing I ask for is her licence and registration. My day to be the comedian. I'm going to have to draw blood to check your alcohol level, I say.